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Tale 11: Store closed = MUST SHOP!

     It’s New Years Day. The slowest the store has ever been. End day totals came up to only $500 or so per register (which, by the way, our boss wanted all four lanes open at all times, despite being dead). Since the store was dead, everyone was bored and just wanted to go home. Oh, but one customer didn't want that. This is her story:  Just before our boss locked the doors for the night, one woman comes into the store and grabs a cart. We all let out a collective groan, knowing what was coming. We made the announcement that the store was closed a minute after she came in.

     Five minutes go by (a long time if you're eager to leave), and she finally comes up to...my register. Why mine? Because my fellow employees decided to close out and let me deal with her. Fortunately my boss reminded them that they can't leave until all customers are out of the store. I start ringing up her stuff, which takes about ten minutes or so because her cart is overflowing, and she is only putting one item on my counter at a time. Because of this, I can't put her filled bags in her cart, and I'm quickly running out room. All the while, she is telling me everything she did for the past two days.

     Now, an amazing phenomena occurs when there are customers at closing time; employees who absolutely hate each other will band together just to get the hell out. My coworkers make a team effort to grab TWO other carts and start putting her bags in them.  After she is finally checked out, she decides to pay with a check. Her bill is over $100, and she wants $20 back. I have to call the manager, who is busy closing up in the back of the store, because the check is over $75. After a few more minutes, he arrives and uses his manager key to approve the check. Finally it's over...or is it? Noooooo. She stands there for a few more minutes getting the rest of her stuff together, and finally FINALLY leaves. Final leaving time:  10:20

Tale 12: Always make sure you have enough money!

     A woman comes up to my register with a full cart. I ring up her stuff and bag it all. The bill comes up to about $60. She finds that she only has $50, and wants me to take stuff off. She digs through her several bags, pulling out piddly stuff like candy bars. I take it off, and the total only changed a few dollars. I take off more stuff after digging around, deciding what she needs, and comparing it to her shopping list. I go to take it off, but I need a manager key since more than $5 is to be taken off.

     My manager uses his key and walks off. Guess what. It’s still too much. I take off more stuff and have to call the manager again. He uses his key. It's too much. Yet AGAIN I have to call the manager. He decides to stay until I'm done with the customer. The new total comes up. Hey! It's less than $50! Now she wants me to ring some stuff back up!  Thankfully, this was the last time, and she finally left.

5-19-03 Update: This lady now gets into my line nearly every Sunday that I work. I'll ring up $100 worth of stuff, and end up taking $30 worth off. EVERY SUNDAY.

Tale 13: Gift Card Man

    Gift Card Man has moved.

Tale 14: Scruffy and Friends!

     First off, yes I do have sympathy for some homeless people. However, I don't have sympathy for the homeless that blow all their money on beer than bother trying to find a job. Anyway, a few Sundays ago, I got stuck working from 3:30 to 10. Now, 3 to 7 on Sundays is chaos. The store is constantly busy during this time. Well, at the beginning of my shift Scruffy and his buddy show up at my lane with a cart full of candy and snack cakes. I check them out, and they pay with their direction card (food stamps in card form). They say they forgot something, and ask if I can hold their stuff behind the counter. Nothing out of the ordinary, so I do.

     About fifteen minutes later, they show up (sans anything new), and open my door and grab their stuff from behind the register, which they aren't supposed to do. They leave. Then Scruffy comes back with some more snacks. He buys them and leaves. However, he's one of those people who stand around and talks to anyone around them about anything, and you can't understand a damn word he says. He's holding up the line, and this annoys the people behind him. He leaves. A few minutes later, he comes back with more candy and some cough drops. He pays for the candy on his direction card, and I tell him that he'll have to pay cash for the cough drops. He's outraged that the cough drops can't be put on his card. I kindly explain to him that it's because they're not food. He then goes on rambling how I should allow it since he eats them like candy. Failing to get him to realize this, I call my boss up to the register.

     He shows up, tries to undo the direction card payment, and can't. So he then tells me to do a refund so it balances out my register. He leaves. Then he returns again with some workers at the homeless shelter. He hits one of them up for some money, who declines, telling him that he knows he'll buy beer with it. So instead, he hits him up for the cough drops. He accepts. Well, he and the other guy from the shelter put their stuff on my counter in one big pile. I start ringing it up, and the one guy yells at me, saying that they're on two separate orders. I ask him to separate which stuff is his. He instead tells me that he'll tell me which things aren't his when I get to them. During all this, I rang up some chocolates for Scruffy, and every time I tried to tell him his total, he'd talk with his buddies, which holds up the line. He tries to leave, and I tell him his total. He asks me why he has to give me money. I tell him, "Because. You. Didn't. Pay. Yet." He finally pays, and, they finally leave.

    Then Scruffy shows up AGAIN and buys more CANDY, and telling us that we should sell beer on Sundays (it's illegal in Ohio without a Sunday Liquor License). After this, he stands around for twenty minutes, talking to random customers about the weather and stuff. Then he finally leaves. GAH.

Tale 15: Let's Shop Without Money!

     Last night, I was training someone who worked at DDM previously, so basically, I was getting paid to stand around and restock candy. Anyway, not even a half hour went by before she got her first stupid customer of her new old job. This lady with a cart full of stuff (Easter knick-knacks) asks us if she can leave her stuff by our counter. We say yes. Then she says that she'll be back Friday because she doesn't have enough money right now. We try to explain that we don't have enough room behind our counter to hold that much stuff until Friday. She keeps insisting, so my trainee begrudgingly starts bagging some of the stuff and putting it behind the counter. Wondering if we're even allowed to do this, I call my boss. It turns out that we're not.

     I get back to the register, and the lady already has her entire cart of stuff spread out on our counter. She's telling my trainee that she opened the box for this small lamp, took it out, and now she can't get it all back in and closed.  I tell her that we're not allowed to hold that much stuff. She then tells us that she didn't want us to hold ALL of her stuff. I tell her to get what she wants to pay for right then and there. She picks out a small sack of dirt...  She pays, and I bring a cart around to put the other stuff in reshop (restocking stuff that people didn't want). I put the stuff in, and she brings another cart around, and puts it next to mine. She then takes stuff out of the cart that I'm still filling and puts it in her cart. She's blocking one of the ways to the exit. Another customer tries to get by, and I tell her. She then says, "Well, she can wait. I won't be long."

     She then picks a wooden clock out of the cart and asks me if it works. I tell her that, yes, it probably does. She then tells me to get a battery to test it. I tell her that I don't have any spare batteries behind the counter, so she tells me to open a new package of batteries. I tell her that I can't do that, and she decides that she doesn't want the clock. Finally, she has a cart full of stuff that she now decides that she can buy. She gets in another cashier's line, and FINALLY LEAVES.